I’ll know I made it as an author when … 09/14/2011
 (The 10 ways I’ll know I’ve made into the BIG time as an author) [Blogger’s Note: My latest novel, SIGNS OF WAR is in her final stages of editing – which means I’m basically sitting here waiting to finalize the graphic design/ISBN/Library of Congress/formatting/publishing so I can release her into the world. In my youth, I would turn to the bottle to pass the time and calm my nerves … nowadays I blog, venting my frustrations with mindless banter without the hangover the next day] By the way … the following is humor … so it’s okay to laugh! I’ll know I made it as an author when … #10 – I don’t mix up my royalty payment from Amazon with a returned payment for a broken Transformers toy I bought for my son. #9 – I stop reading spam mail like its fan mail. #8 – Joe Konrath replies to one of my comments on his blogs. #7 – I stop reading Joe Konrath’s blogs because I’m too busy being a successful author. Joe recently intimated that only loser writers (like me) read his blogs because once a writer is successful, he/she doesn’t waste his/her time reading blogs. They’re too busy being John Malkovich. #6 – Joe Konrath asks me to write a guest blog for him … one that I won’t read because I’m too busy being John Malkovich. #5 – Cris De Niro appears in Brad Thor’s newest offering: Athena Project II: Cris & the Chicks #4 – I write my next novel at a cabin in between fishing for muskie (like Joe Konrath) #3 – I write my first non-fiction piece, How I Pre-Sold 1 Million eBooks #2 – I lay out the pennies for a Kindle of my very own instead of stealing my wife’s like I’m a degenerate raiding her panty drawer. #1 – My wife changes my name in her OUTLOOK from “Friggin’ Author” to “Sugar Daddy” I hope I publish this book soon … is all I’m saying … p.s. Apologies to Joe Konrath … though, I’m sure he’s too successful to ever read this blog. c”,) CommentsScott Nicholson 09/15/2011 5:57am
LOL, you'll be a writer when you could care less what my buddy Konrath does... 09/15/2011 10:44am
This is frightening how you appear to be describing me! Right about the Amazon payments. 09/16/2011 10:56am
I'm sorry, but you made my day! Hilarious! Please email me when you've made the big time! Don't forget us little people, please - we still need you even if Joe doesn't! 09/16/2011 1:09pm
Funny! I thought I was the only one with a list of "if I make them talk to me, I will have arrived." Heh Leave a Reply | Subscribe to Self-Pubber's Pub!
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